In March this year, an Indian tourist in Vietnam took to Reddit, lamenting that the locals were often rude to him, and that he felt he was “shouldering the consequences of other Indian tourists’ misbehaviour”.
“Let’s be real,” he posted. “A lot of these so-called travellers are an embarrassment. Many come here with zero respect for local customs, treating Vietnam like their personal playground.” Indian men, he said, were notorious for their lewdness towards Vietnamese women, who had learnt to steer clear if an Indian was headed their way. “It’s gotten so bad that women in massage spas outright refuse Indian men because of past experiences.”
“For every one decent, respectful Indian traveller, there are five who ruin it for everyone else. And guess who gets the heat for it? People like me, who actually try to be respectful. . . I feel second-hand shame.”
A recent viral video from Thailand showed a barefoot Indian in Bermuda shorts screaming at top volume in a 5-star hotel because of a billing issue. They apologised, promised a refund, and displayed the utmost restraint while he raved and shrieked in unrestrained fury. He even rushed outside the hotel to physically prevent other tourists from entering, telling them that the hotel was full of rogues.
There are enough Indians who are admired, respected, and charismatic, many of them in top leadership positions. Indians are even held up in some countries as an example of a “model minority” for their intelligence, knowledge, efficiency, and success. But it’s the uncouth Indian, it seems, who has an outsize impact on how Indians are perceived.
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A new global commentary seems to be emerging around how Indians — both diaspora and tourists — behave. Indians are increasingly being stereotyped as crude, uncouth, thoughtless, or entitled, utterly lacking civic sense. They seem to carry a certain nationalistic arrogance, as though to say, I’m from India, give me what I want when I want it, or get out of my way.
What do you think? Is this who we are today? Agree? Disagree? Strongly? Very strongly?
It’s not a popular topic. The average Indian learns early that introspection and self-criticism are not welcome or culturally approved pastimes. In today’s India, you risk being labelled unpatriotic and treasonous, probably not even a Hindu, if you point to flaws in our national temperament.
One popular counter-argument is: Not all Indians are like that. But who’s counting? The exemplary Indian will never make news because he is discreet and respectful, seldom seen or heard. The headlines will always go to the uncouth fellow with dyed hair in Bermuda shorts making a pass at the spa therapist.
India may be at a unique inflexion point precisely because the national narrative promotes the notion that we are an ancient, highly evolved people who figured out most things before anyone else. Hindu Indians, I am required to believe, are a super-race. We are spiritual guides, gurus to the world. We are a power centre.
You must wonder, then, why a senior police official in Thailand was recently heard saying that there has been a spike in the number of young Indians being arrested for molesting Thai women. Or why growing numbers of establishments are quietly adopting unstated “Indian policies” such as requiring larger deposits, or even denying service to all-male Indian groups. Yes, even in warm, welcoming countries like Thailand and Vietnam.
I tread the middle way and stay out of trouble, but I have a question. If we are uncouth and lack civic sense, where did we learn it? The answer to that lies not abroad but right here at home. Here are some behaviours you don’t have to go to Vietnam or Thailand to see: cutting queues; littering; spitting; being noisy in public spaces; expecting special treatment because you “know” someone or are “special”; absence of common courtesies such as please and thank you; treating service staff badly (think air hostesses); and staring at women.
I also learned early as an Indian that mine was a society of shortcuts, hacks, and quick fixes, where bending rules and cheating the system by using connections or bribes was applauded as a sign of smartness. In a word, jugaad. The result is uniquely Indian: utter chaos in public spaces, where rules, such as traffic, are frequently disregarded. Any system that works is seen as a challenge to be circumvented with jugaad.
We live in environments where fighting for efficiency and fairness is woven into daily life. In the race, whether it is to get a ration card or get off the plane, it’s each person for themselves, and the devil take the hindmost. Add a healthy dose of nationalism, exceptionalism, and the belief that we can do no wrong, and you will get a slew of obnoxious behaviours. If you are the respectful, decent, thoughtful Indian who draws attention to this, you will become a target.
A comment in the viral Reddit thread captured it perfectly: “Many Indians are arrogant and almost delusional to the point that they don’t even realise their behaviour is shitty. Trust me, our reputation is done.”
You can reach C Y Gopinath at cygopi@gmail.com
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The views expressed in this column are the individual’s and don’t represent those of the paper.